Reality is Your Friend

Why Hope is not a Strategy in Startups

One of my favorite life credos is “Reality is Your Friend.”

I borrowed this idea from my favorite business book - Integrity by Henry Cloud. It means that no matter how difficult it is for us to accept, we are always better off knowing the truth. Once we embrace the truth, we can often address our situation very effectively. Usually, we need to get to the truth to be able to address our situation at all.

It sounds simple, but it’s not easy. I say this because embracing reality is not a default human behavior. Honestly, our default behavior is to be dishonest with ourselves.

For example:

• The sales leader who isn’t hitting their sales numbers believes that “it’s only a matter of time” before their leads turn around and convert.

• The founder is almost out of money but is in conversation with interested investors. If “just one” of these investors signs, the company will be flush and back to a growth trajectory.

• The manager with a report is an exceptional contributor with an awful attitude. If the company starts doing well, the manager thinks, the attitude problem will “fix itself.”

What all of these stories have in common is hope. In every situation above, a heroic tale was available where the problem fixed itself. Also, in every situation above, hope was not a strategy. In my experience observing start-ups, I never saw a problem like this “fix itself.” The founders either fixed it, or the company went under.

As a coping strategy, it’s much easier for our egos to tell ourselves a heroic tale than to accept a humiliating reality. I think it’s much more courageous to make reality your friend.

I once advised a founder whose company was going under. He needed more money, a better product, and a working business model. The founder had also hired several employees who had become demotivated and had lost faith in the business. Many of these employees had left promising jobs to join his company, and he couldn’t let them go.

The founder lost a lot of sleep agonizing over his decision before laying off almost the entire team. He ultimately realized it was better to send his employees to thriving companies than remain on life support at his company.

Years later, the company is now thriving and employs hundreds of employees. I recently told this founder I’m proud of his courage to face the demands of reality.

Is reality your friend? Or a distant acquaintance? Where do you have an opportunity to be more courageous?